Changes I didn't expect

Have had an interesting weekend.

It was my birthday yesterday and I had a kind of twilight zone day.  I woke up sick and aching.  I had a physio session on Friday and my hip and knee were hurting.  But then, so was every other bone and muscle in my body.  Had to miss my walk up Mt Ainslie and everything else I had planned for the day.  I got up, got Panadol, and went back to bed for four hours with the leccie blankie on in a coccoon of heat.  Felt marginally better when I got up.

My great friend Mrs A came and picked me up and whisked me off to dinner at a friend's.  Such a lovely meal.  Given I'd only eaten toast and 3 mandarins all day, I thought it might be OK to go a little chocolate and cake as well as the very nice, carb load, OK super delicious potatoes and meat and beans and pears and meat and smoky bacon dinner.

Got up this morning and went to Bikram.  To my surprise, I wasn't totally exhausted at the end.  Just exhausted.  And I actually managed to grip onto the right bits of me occasionally.  How can 90 minutes go that fast?  I might actually, just maybe, sort of be starting to get it.  And it makes me feel taller.

But it does make me drink and drink and drink water afterwards which makes me feel quite sick.  So I've learned that a glass of skim milk with a little chocolate Quick makes me feel better faster.  I decided to give myself a day off the 12WBT for my birthday present to myself.  I picked up a large watermelon juice on the way to the craft markets where they were having their annual celebration of wool day.  I love watermelon juice.  It is one of my favourite, comforting, soothing things of all time.  When I was on chemo, despite the burning in my mouth and throat when I drank cold things, I craved and HAD to have watermelon juice.  But today, I had my first sip and though, 'oh, this is SO sweet' and I didn't enjoy it at all.  And I had to have water to get rid of the sweetness out of my mouth.

Think I would have learned my lesson, but no.  Got to the markets and was starving of course.  A glass of milk and a glass of watermelon juice does not breakfast make.  So I had another one of my favourites, a dish of lentil stew and coconut chicken with njera.  Love my Ethiopian food.  I thought I'd go a large size as I was so hungry.  And I ate it and it was way tasty, but it was WAY too much.  I haven't been able to eat anything else all day although I am contemplating some fruit toast and ricotta for supper.

Who on earth is this person who does not think much of watermelon juice and can't polish off a plate of food and then have a cake and coffee on top of that?  Who is this woman who gets up at 7am on a Sunday to go to stretch herself into a pretzel at 8am right on the other side of town?  And who who WHO is this Andriana that goes to the Bus Depot Markets and has absolutely NO, zero, zip, NO desire to go and snack through all the yummy things out for tasting that people are selling.  I do not know this person. She thinks in a totally different way and wants totally different things.  Now, let's see if she sticks around.